Even healthy relationships can eventually go bad if you don't nurture them on a consistent basis. Without this nourishment of daily cultivation, your marriage can suffer and lead to terrible fights and even worse. 70% of Americans believe that marriage should be for life, and that only very extreme circumstances should come between couples. So here are a few ways to keep your marriage going strong: Communication
As any therapist, friend, or nosy neighbor will tell you, open communication is the key to maintaining a healthy relationship. And they are all correct. Discuss problems openly and calmly, even write them down if you must. Be honest about your past and your expectations for the future. No one can read minds, and if your spouse doesn't know something that you're not communicating, they can't be held responsible for that. Of course, the other half of communication is listening. Be sure to also listen to your spouse, and don't just blow off comments that concern or upset you, even if they are made out of jest. The more you hold in, the more likely you will explode later.
Actively Love
There is more to love than just saying it. According to famous author Gary Chapman, there are 5 main ways to give and receive love. Words of Affirmation: Be sure to tell your spouse why they are special to you. Get specific and focus on all the things you love about them. Either tell them aloud or write notes or letters to them—your point will get across. Quality Time: It is much harder for couples to feel close to each other when they are too busy to spend time together. Overly busy lives can lead to additional stress, especially if you are not having any time with your spouse. The stress can be taken out on each other, which is never good. Quality time is an important part of connecting. Gifts: The giving and receiving of gifts is a good way to show that you love someone. They don't have to be expensive. Little handmade gifts can be even more special because it came from only you. Service: Performing a task for your spouse that they usually perform can be a nice way to show that you are thinking about them and that you care. Physical Touch: Making sure that you still hold hands when you're going out, or to rub each other's shoulders after a hard day, or just any playful touch like tickling, playing with your hair, or bear-hugs can really show your spouse that you are still very attracted to and interested in them, which is always a stress reliever and confidence booster.
All these things are good because they are active. Love is more an ability than it is a feeling.
Get Professional Help
If your problems are more serious than just the everyday troubles of married life, you may want to consider hiring a marriage family counseling expert. Find someone who you both are equally comfortable with is important. Also search for someone with the experience you need to get your marriage back on its feet. Marriage is important, and should go through great lengths to stay healthy.
