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There are many myths about violence against women in India. Domestic violence can scar a person physically as well as emotionally. Emotional abuse can take place in a number of ways – name calling, frequently mocking the way a person behaves, speaks, dresses, or their appearance. It could also include ridiculing the woman or her relatives or family members in front of others or in private. Constantly hearing criticism about oneself like looks or life choices affects one’s self-confidence. A woman can be said to be facing sexual violence if her partner forces her to engage in any form of sexual activity against her will regardless of her marital status. Similarly, economic violence occurs if she finds her finances controlled by her partner or relatives, if she is forbidden to work, or if her spending activity is being monitored. Emotional, sexual and economic abuse are more likely to be ignored or not acknowledged as violence by the person facing them. Physical abuse is as common as emotional, sexual or economic abuse, but more likely to leave visible scars. Women may be slapped, punched and hit with objects by the abuser. Some abusers try to hide the harm they are causing by only doing it when no-one else is around. Survivors of this kind of violence may themselves try to hide bruises, scars and marks resulting from the violence. The root cause of domestic violence is the power imbalance that exists between the perpetrator and the person facing violence. However, there are a number of factors that are often cited as causes of domestic violence or excuses for domestic violence. 1. Facing or Witnessing abuse in formative years An individual who has grown up witnessing abuse around them or facing abuse themselves may themselves grow up to become perpetrators of violence. 2. Social Norms Social norms often make violence appear acceptable and a necessary component of ‘masculinity’ or what it means to ‘be a man’. Thus, violence against women and domestic violence appear ‘normal’ or ‘acceptable’ to them. 3. Dowry The practice of giving money or other gifts to the groom’s family by the bride’s family is still prevalent in India. Families that feel they have not been given ‘adequate’ dowry may direct their dissatisfaction or anger towards the new bride. As a result, dowry deaths are common as well. 4. Alcohol Alcoholism and drinking are often cited as causes of domestic violence, but it is important to understand that this is a myth surrounding domestic violence. However, an individual may turn violent in situations such as being denied access to alcohol or when requested to cut down on drinking. Alcohol is an unacceptable excuse for domestic violence and not a cause of domestic violence. The high rate of domestic violence in India makes it clear that one of the biggest myths about domestic violence is the idea that the home is the safest place for a woman. A woman who is being abused may believe that the violence she faces is her fault. To an outsider, the exact opposite is likely to be true. It is important to understand that an abused person is never responsible for the violence. The perpetrator of abuse is the one that makes the choice to be abusive An important point to note about domestic violence is that it is not a personal matter. It is crucial that anyone who knows about domestic violence taking place makes a move to act to end it. There is still widespread ignorance about the law around domestic violence in India and the fact that domestic violence illegal. The survivor of domestic violence, the perpetrator, or even a witness or bystander should be aware that according to the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act (PWDVA), a domestic violence complaint can be lodged at any police station by the person facing domestic violence, or even by someone who is aware that this violence is taking place. There are ways to seek help if you or someone you know is facing abuse. There are many organisations who can offer support. They can be contacted here. Santosh Kumar is the author of this article. He writes blogs and columns on his favorite topics like domestic violence in India. In this article he has shared information about domestic violence against women.
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