Is there life after the breakup? It’s a tough question, especially if you had a serious relationship with the person you loved and cared about. It does not matter who initiated the end of the relationship. It still hurts and bothers. You see flashbacks in your head that always remind you about your ex. And obviously it affects your mood, behavior and deprives you of energy. How can one handle this and how to move on and start thinking about a new relationship? Let's try to figure it out.
Consequences you may face
First of all you should know the enemy by sight. There are some consequences you may possibly face after your breakup.
1. Your mind may be full of thoughts about your ex.
2. One may lose faith in healthy relationships.
3. There are obviously some mutual friends left and you will need to handle that as well.
4. Also, there may be some common things, purchases, presents, etc.
5. And of course all the psychological consequences, including bad mood, depression, etc.
It is extremely important to reveal these problems and work on them.
Here are some tips.
Here is the nice article: How to break up with someone you love pain free.
How to recover after the breakup
Before you jump into a new relationship you need to recover from your previous one. And here are some tips to do that.
Get rid of things that remind you of your ex. Obviously you cannot just delete all the memories and throw out all the stuff. But there are always some things that remind you of bad things that happen between you and your ex. Try to remove them from your life.
Talk to a friend. The next step is to share your feelings with your close friend you really trust. Just tell him / her everything that is in your heart. Good friend will always understand you and will find the right words to support you.
Here is the nice article: What to do when you broke up with your girlfriend.
Try to focus on something. Are there things that can entirely grab your attention? These could be sports, fishing, writing your own blog or doing some handmade stuff. Or perhaps, you were thinking about some activities you never tried before, like yoga, meditation, vocal lessons, etc. Just go ahead and do that. This helps a lot.
Rethink your break. So, you were able to focus on different things and you realize that your life is not that bad. Now it’s a good time to return your ex from the far corner of your thoughts and deliver the final blow. Try to make a list of all the positive things that the split brought you. For example, you have more free time, you no longer have to listen to some annoying complaints and that you don’t have to waste your time on something that would crash anyways. Even though it comes from a negative perspective, it works pretty well.
Here is the nice article: How to get over your ex: 10 steps.
Your first steps for a new relationship
Only when you feel that you got over your ex, can you make your first steps towards new relationships.
Make sure to check the post: Life after divorce for men after 40.
Start with your social activity. The easiest way is social media. Register your account on Facebook and Instagram. Post some updates from your life and add new friends there. Comment and like posts. This way you will show your active position and find new people.
Then, visit some meetups, workshops, trainings, where you can meet new people and create new connections.
Check this awesome tutorial: How to find a girlfriend.
You can also try some modern online dating sites. Usually it’s the fastest way, since all people there are looking for relationships as well.
Your age is not a problem. For example, there are best dating sites for seniors over 60.
The more new places you visit, the more possible social cycles you join.
Although, there are some cases when you already know who you always liked but never made the first step. This is a perfect chance to do that.
Traditionally the first step should be made by a man. If you know the girl you want to go out with just offer her to grab a cup of coffee some time.
But if you don’t know her well, but really want to take a chance don’t hurry up. Try to check with her friends, find her on Instagram, like and comment on her posts. This way you will make her aware of your existence and catch her attention.
When you feel that the connection is established go ahead and ask her out.
Well this applies to girls as well.
Tips for your dates
When you are on a date don’t start with speaking about your ex or about your break up. One can speak about this only if there was a direct question about that.
Good thing is that you can date and build your relationship avoiding your previous mistakes. When you are alone try to think if you did anything wrong in your past dates and avoid this in your present relationship.
Basically you start from the very beginning, so don’t rush up, because you can scare him / her away.
And again, your age is not a problem. Here is a wonderful motivating post: dating for seniors over 70: safety and stability.
Try to forget about your fears. It’s a completely new person in front of you. So, you need to trust. Otherwise you are unlikely to succeed.
So, no matter how hard it was to break up with your ex there is still life after that. You need to put yourself together, get over your ex and start building new relationships.
Don’t look at your breakup as a failure. Consider it as your precious experience and move on.
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