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The Washington Nationals and DC Politics by Stephen Bye





The Washington Nationals and DC Politics by
Article Posted: 11/01/2019
Article Views: 145
Articles Written: 20
Word Count: 817
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The Washington Nationals and DC Politics


 
Government,Humor,Sports
The Washington Nationals and DC Politics

How about the inspiring performance of the Washington Nationals, who “stayed in the fight” to become World Series champions? I must have missed Donald Trumps “Tweet” informing the world that he was solely responsible for the Nationals’ victory, claiming their success was solely derived from his political theme of “Nationalism.”

Two former Major League Baseball teams in Washington were called the Senators. Although they did win the World Series in 1924, the adage about the former team’s record was “first in war, first in peace…and last in the American League.” The Nationals are in the National League, but the old team would have had won many more championships if they had been called the “Washington Americans”.

The original Washington Senators team was founded in 1901 and relocated to Minnesota in 1960 and renamed the Twins. An expansion franchise was awarded to Washington in 1961, which relocated again in 1972 to become the Texas Rangers. The team name was doomed from the beginning because of the nickname. Senators, defined as “a group with power in the government, never quite applied to the Washington Senators…other than Frank Howard and Harmon Killebrew, none of the former Senator baseball players hit with power.

The Nationals were created from the remnants of the Montreal Expos, a team that had great promise but could never win…like the Libertarian Party. When the team relocated to DC in 2005, politicians were finally happy with something imported from Canada…eh? The name “Expos” was originally chosen after Montreal’s big show, World Fair Expo 67. Major League Baseball is also called “The Show” and if there was another place defined as “The Show”, DC certainly fits. Since DC politicians have been floating the country down the river (The Potomac) for years, the new team name in 2005 could have been the “Washington SHOW-boats”, instead of the Nationals.

In late May, The Nats had a horrible record of 19-31 and a few frustrated Congressmen were proposing a bill for the U.S. Government to take over the team. They proposed adding a “G” for “Government” to alter the team name to the “Gnats”. That seemed like a perfect fit for DC politicians, since gnats are aggravating. They bite, swarm and are bloodsuckers too.

Washington Nationals’ ownership thought a name change would bring better luck, so several nicknames were proposed, like the “Swamp Creatures”. With falling attendance in May at National’s Park, the team wanted to run the movie “Creature from the Black Lagoon’ and the TV series “Swamp People” on the big screen during the game for added entertainment.

The club discovered that the song “Baby Shark” had become popular to play during the game, as fans demonstrated various moves to mimic a shark bite. A switch of the name to “Sharks” was a logical conclusion to create a winning team. It was also a perfect description for DC politicians who, like sharks, are often predatory and very cunning.

The club was so desperate for help, they accepted a call from Donald Trump, who suggested the team name should be renamed the “Washington Trumps”. Trump also promised an executive order that every time Washington played the St. Louis Cardinals, the Trumps would automatically win by Trumping the Cards. As a quid pro quo, Trump demanded that all revenue from team promotional clothing and marketing material would be assigned to a company controlled by Ivanka Trump. In addition, the products would include the inscription “Trumps…The Best Major League Baseball Team Ever.”

Given the spendthrift philosophies in Congress over the last 50 years, the Tea Party members in Congress suggested a new name of the “Washington Drunken Sailors.” To boost attendance, the team would offer free beer night when they played the Milwaukee Brewers. However, the name was discarded after an objection was received from the Department of the Navy.

Around that time, the House of Representatives began to focus on the impeachment of Donald Trump. The battle cry was “Impeach…impeach…impeach” so a few Democrats proposed the name “Washington imPeaches” with a rotting peach as the team image.

In early June, the club was evaluating various strategies to improve the Nationals’ record. However, the team suddenly began to win, so they postponed the decision on the nickname. With a World Series Championship now in hand, the club has officially decided to keep the name “Washington Nationals”.

With the political wars taking center stage in the media, most folks haven’t heard about the rumor that the Houston Astros are planning to protest the World Series outcome, insisting that the Nationals stole their signs and demanding to replay the games they lost. Another story circulating reported the House Intelligence Committee is planning to investigate President Trumps’ quid pro quo phone conversations involving the Washington Nationals.

Looking Forward Through the Rear View Mirror

Related Articles - Humor, Baseball, Satire, World Series, Politics, Washington Nationals, Donald Trump,

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