Many men would agree that self-pleasuring is just about the most fun a man can have by himself - but that’s not to say that self-pleasuring can’t be shared with another. While the idea of self-stimulating in front of and/or in tandem with a partner may seem odd or uncomfortable to some men, it can actually be a very helpful way to communicate information about oneself sensually to another - and to also learn about that other person sensually at the same time. As long as he practices good manhood care, there’s no physical reason a guy needs to be uncomfortable with this situation, although some may require a little "push" to get them over the hump emotionally. |
How to start
Every couple is different, but unless their sensual play has already naturally involved self-stimulating in front of one another (perhaps as foreplay or post-play related to intimacy), bringing up the idea of mutual self-pleasuring might be difficult. Once the subject has been broached, however, a couple should decide on how they want to approach this. Some things to consider might be the following:
- Do we want this to happen "on its own" or as part of a prelude to intimacy?
- Will we self-gratify one after the other or at the same time?
- Shall we touch only ourselves or shall we be allowed to touch each other?
There is no right or wrong way to go about this, but here are some possible approaches a couple may take to mutual self-pleasuring.
- One watches, then explains. With this approach, one partner self-gratifies (as un-self-consciously as possible and as if they were alone) while the other observes. When the self-stimulator has finished, the observer details what they saw - what things they did that surprised them, ways they touched themselves that surprised them, how the self-pleasurer’s reactions felt to the observer, et cetera. The self-stimulator can then respond, adding to what has been said or providing new information that the observer might have missed. And then, of course, the partners switch roles and do it again.
- Talk it out. Here, each partner self-gratifies at the same time, standing (or sitting or lying) a decent distance from each other so that they have a clear view of the other. While self-stimulating, each one talks about what they are doing, why they are doing it, how it feels, et cetera. - although they try not to talk over each other, so that the other can hear and learn "in real time" what the other likes sensually.
- Lending a hand. One partner self-stimulates the other. The one being self-stimulated talks directly to the partner during this, letting them know when something feels good or when it does not feel right, what they can do to make it feel better, whether they should go faster, slower, deeper, et cetera. It’s especially good during this time to encourage the partner to touch sensuous zones other than those with which they may already be familiar.
- All together. Partners sit, stand, or lie face to face, so that they are as close as is possible. One partner self-gratifies themselves and is also self-stimulated at the same time by the partner, with each talking as they do. ("Does this feel better or this?" "Can you move your hand a little higher?") They then switch when the first partner feels completed.
There are practically limitless other variations a couple can employ: the key thing is that they communicate with the other what feels nice or doesn’t provide the desired feeling.
Mutual self-pleasuring is an excellent way to communicate sensually, but a man will feel more at ease if his member is in good health as well as in good hands. Regular use of a first-rate male organ health oil (health professionals recommend Man 1 Man Oil, which is clinically proven mild and safe for skin) can help. Look for an oil with both a high-end emollient (such as shea butter) and a natural hydrating agent (such as vitamin E) to keep manhood skin looking and feeling smooth.. In addition, an oil with vitamin C, a key component of collagen, a tissue in the body that gives skin its tone and elasticity, is also recommended.
Visit www.menshealthfirst.com for more information about treating common male organ health problems, including soreness, redness and loss of male organ sensation. John Dugan is a professional writer who specializes in men's health issues and is an ongoing contributing writer to numerous online web sites.
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