Sometimes there comes a point during a marriage when a man (you) starts to wonder if his wife is having an affair. It can start with just the smallest of doubts about whether she's being faithful; a more of a subconscious feeling from changes in her behavior that you may not completely see or understand. But what do you do when you get this feeling? |
There are three possible plans of action you could take.
1. You could immediately accuse her of being a cheating wife before you have any shred of proof. While this may be the quick emotional response you have to ask yourself what if you're wrong. A false accusation could damage your marriage just as much as if she was actually having an affair. Her sense of your trust in her may be irreversibly damaged.
2. You could ignore those feeling or her sudden change in behavior and do nothing, hoping that you're wrong or maybe you just don't want to deal with the emotional kick in the crotch such thoughts bring. While burying your head in the sand may be the safe thing to do short term, ignoring the situation will come back and bite you in the ass over the long term.
3. Prepare yourself for the worst that can happen while at the same time start paying closer attention to her behavior and try and find out if your feelings are indeed true. This means looking for the tell-tale signs that tell if your wife is cheating or may be cheating.
If you take the first two plans of action there is no reason to read any farther. If, on the other hand, you want to either confirm or lay your suspicions to rest it's time to take a closer look at your wife’s activities and behavior. Here are six warning signs that point towards an adulterous wife.
1. Changing her appearance – Getting a new hair style, wearing more revealing clothing and paying more attention to her makeup before she leaves for work or to go out with friends.
2. Lack of interest in sex – or she suddenly has the desire to try out new things in bed. Stuff neither of you ever thought about or things she refused to try in the past. She may be learning these new skills elsewhere.
3. Fewer arguments – If things you used to do that set her off no longer do that could show she doesn’t really care what you do anymore. Her focus is somewhere else.
4. Less interested in family – If she's spending less time with not only you and the kids but also other family members she used to spend time with she could be trying to hide her actions.
5. Spending more time on the phone or internet – This is particularly true if she doesn't want you around when she engaged in these activities.
6. Kids start to act different – Kids are remarkably perceptive. They may not know exactly what's going on but they to can sense changes in mom's behavior.
Once her odd behavior has strengthened your feeling that she is indeed stepping out with someone else you can start to gather the evidence you need to confront her. Whether such an affair will destroy your marriage is a decision you and your wife will have to come to. Sometimes there is nothing left to save and moving on is the best choice. There is a high level of trust in any marriage and once that has been broken it is hard to ever get it back.
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