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Having a baby can simultaneously be the most wonderful, terrifying and exhausting time in your life. Stating a baby can change your life would be an understatement: a baby can completely turn your life on its head! Here are some tips by Relate guide Elizabeth Martyn to help you cope with the shock of a newborn baby: Emotions * Anger is commonly experienced by new mothers who feel angry at their baby for not cooperating, angry at their partner for not helping enough and even just for feeling angry in the first place. Taking yourself out of the situation, even just for an hour, can help soothe your nerves. * Don’t worry if you don’t feel a bond with your baby immediately. For some this can take time and happen gradually, but it will happen. * Don’t bottle up your feelings. Talk to your partner, friends and family – chances are they many of them will have experienced similar feelings themselves. Loss of routine * Take practical steps, such as stocking up on frozen meals, and cutting down on non-essential tasks * Accept all offers of help from friends and family for jobs such as ironing, supermarket runs or anything else that would come in handy * Know that the tiny baby phase will be short lived, and in a few months your baby will be sitting up, playing and starting to feed at a reasonable hour Crying babies * Work with your partner and take turns in looking after your crying baby. When it’s not your turn try not to hover – get away from the noise and if needed go out and get some fresh air * Get help by asking a friend, relative or someone you trust to look after your baby for an hour to give you a break Sleepless nights * Be kind to your partner and be aware that loss of sleep causes frayed tempers * Ask friends with children for tips on getting babies off to sleep – you never know, they could work a treat for your newborn * Don’t try and keep your house immaculate – your need for sleep should come high up of your list of priorities * Line up grandparents, parents and friends to take the baby for a walk around the park for an hour or two to allow you some time to rest For more parent support , including live one to one chat with a counsellor, visit Relate for Parent’s website at: http://www.relateforparents.org.uk
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