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One of a parent's biggest roles (and, at times, most important challenges) is to help instill a sense of personal responsibility in their children. Helping a child to learn that sense of responsibility is a role that will continue throughout your child's young life, and it can start in toddlerhood. Toddlerhood is the magical stage of life in which children are eager to learn new things and just as eager to help you do the things they see you doing around the house. They want to learn how things work and they want to feel a part of the family and all of the work that a family does. So how can you start teaching your child about responsibility? Here are three main ways that toddlers learn responsibility. 1. Teach personal responsibility as it relates to their "things." First, ask your toddler to be responsible for her own toys. Direct your child to pick up her own toys before she moves on to the next task, whether that's taking a nap, going to the kitchen for a snack, or even getting out a new group of toys. You might need to help her with this task, and explain why we clean things up before we move on to something else. If this is done every day, from the time that she is very small, it becomes so natural - so part of the day's routine - that she will be more likely to keep things picked up as she grows. You can make this chore more fun by playing music or singing a special song when it's time to clean up. Or turn the task into a game, timing her to see how long it takes her to put the blocks in the bin, for example. You might even want to have a toddler responsibility chart, which shows your toddlers successes with a series of gold stars. Toddlers love rituals, so it might really help to have the same routine or to sing the same song each time she performs a particular task. When my children were toddlers, it was very helpful for me to tell them what we were going to do first, second, and third, throughout the day. In other words, when I told them the plan of action during the course of the day, they were more ready to move on to the next item on the list when the time came. For example, I might say, "First, we'll play this game, and then we'll put it away, and then we'll have a snack." Consistency is key, and I would tell my toddlers “the plan" over and over again during the day, particularly if that plan was going to deviate significantly from an ordinary day's routine. Of course, encouraging your toddler to be responsible with her toys and putting away her things will come much easier if you have an organized system already in place. Make sure that every toy has a “home" so that it's easier for you and your child to know when it has been put away properly. When your toddlers is all finished, lavish her with praise and tell her what a responsible child she is for taking care of her toys. 2. Help your toddler take care of himself. You can also help instill a sense of responsibility by encouraging your child to take the reins when it comes to his own self care and personal hygiene. Again, rituals are so important. Your toddler will brush his teeth after breakfast and dinner, for example, and take a bath just before storytime. Praise your child when he begins to understand that these tasks are part of his routine and tell him that he is doing a good job of taking care of his teeth and his body, which are very responsible "big boy" things to do. 3. Let your toddlers help you as much as possible. Whenever your child wants to help you tidy up the house, make dinner, bake cookies, or fold laundry, challenge yourself to come up with at least a small part of that task that he can do himself. Children love to feel a sense of ownership in the family routine, and their work is an important part of that. There are other tasks, such as feeding the dog, that young children may be able to do with assistance, as well. Ask your toddlers to tell you what they would most like to do to help out around the house. These daily chores are a great way to instill responsibility, but you don't want to overdo it. Make sure the chores are suitable for their age and stage of development and do your best to help make them fun. As your children grow into preschoolers and beyond, they will begin to take on larger and more important chores, and your expectations on them will increase naturally over time. Soon, they will be learning responsibility by earning and saving money and contributing even more to the life of the family through more time-consuming chores. For now, enjoy this tender, magical stage. Be consistent with your expectations on your toddlers, and praise them for doing such important work and for being such important members of the family. Jamie Jefferson writes for the online parenting magazine Momscape as well as Susies-Coupons.com and New Coupons and Deals, where you'll find the latest online coupon codes, as well as printable grocery coupons.
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