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How to work together with the people who you don't like by ann yang





Article Author Biography
How to work together with the people who you don't like by
Article Posted: 05/30/2011
Article Views: 47
Articles Written: 137
Word Count: 829
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How to work together with the people who you don't like


 
Career
Sometimes in your career, you will come across having to work with people you don’t like. So, how do you work with them? Admittedly, it is a huge challenge for many people, but it is a fact of working life. No matter how much we do not like it, the interactions are crucial to get work done.

Many newbies and veteransalike are caught asking this question day-in and day-out at work – how do I work with people I don’t like? Should I force myself to do it? Pretend I like them? Do I really leave my values at home when I go to work?

The answer is – no, you do not have to. Of course the remedy may not be easy. It will entail you having to step out of your ego for a while to see what is truly happening and to give you clarity of the situation. That stepping out of your own ego is the toughest to do. But it is a worthwhile step. When you are able to do it, it feels like a huge stone is lifted off your heart.How to work with people you don’t like? Try these 3 steps individually or in combination.

Engage To engage in this case means to communicate with them. Step out of your own ego to get yourself to sincerely talk to them. You may be pleasantly surprised that the other person wants to talk too.To engage also means not to hold any grudges against the other person. Face the issue with the other party and discuss whatever challenges you may have candidly. Say what you mean politely. You can be stern but do not be rude. The important thing about how to work with people you don’t like is to be sincere about it. When you are sincere, you are seeking a win-win situation. Think about this, when you engage this person, being sincere is also a transfer of feelings, and which means you want the other person to know that you genuinely want tosettle any animosity you have with each other. It helps you in the long run too.

Enlighten Have you ever tried to enlighten them about yourself? Have you ever tried to enlighten yourself about them? Perhaps one reason you do not like them is that you do not understand them. And because of it, whatever they do doesn’t seem right. Then all the negativity feeds on each other and the animosity grows.

Seek to allow them to get to know you personally.The information about you may enlighten them about you. It gives them insight into who you are, why you do those things and the way you do them. When people understand you more, there is a better chance they will begin to like you. Of course, there is no guarantee it will work. At the very least there is a chance.

Get to know them on a more personal level too.Enlighten yourself about them. What makes them tick, what you do disturbs them or even irritates them? Perhaps with this piece of information you may start to know how to work with people you don’t like.

Entertain To do this, first you must be able to have a sense of humor. Sure, to have a sense of humor around someone you don’t like is tough. But the tougher thing is that you should have a sense of humor when the situation becomes tense and when you feel animosity. Cracking a joke and looking at the lighter side of things can break a smile on the face of people you don’t like. When you do that you can be someone fun to work with. Perhaps you never think of it, but you are someone who is tough to work with. Have you ever considered you are part of the problem?

Ask yourself; are you fun to work with? Do you complain and gossip a lot? Perhaps you are too dogmatic with certain things. You could entertain the person with an afterwork drink. Or invite the person out for lunch. Sometimes it takes more than one session for the person to open up. At the very least, they do feel your sincerity. In a less formal situation people can open up and speak more frankly. Assuming the above is difficult to do, try to entertain yourself by the tough questions and resistance coming from the person. In work situations, you know the people whom you don’t like is likely to raise toughquestions in order to make them difficult for you. It can be very satisfying when you are able to answer them. Dogged determination can wear even the most difficult person down.

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