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In the recent National Day Rally Speech, one thing struck us as distinctly significant. It was delivered in an unusually impassioned way by our Prime Minister, typically known for his deliberate and measured responses. And it was his intensity that grabbed us. Raising examples of an increasing number of neighbors quarreling over common spaces, parking lots – or worse, rallying together to oppose nursing homes and studio apartments in their district, PM Lee said that Singaporeans seemed to be getting “less patient, less tolerant, less willing to compromise in order to get along”. Singapore may be a small island, but its people cannot be small-minded, said Mr Lee. He urged Singaporeans to be “big-hearted to our neighbors, to our fellow citizens, in fact, to our fellow human beings”. In our pursuit to success and to get ahead, we often forget about the people along the way. Everyone is deserving of respect and should be treated with dignity. Many things in our lives can trigger development of impatience and intolerance. There are so many circumstances outside of our control and we can choose to respond in anger and frustration, lashing out at people around us or, we can choose to manage the one thing we CAN control – ourselves. If you find your blood pressure starting to rise over situations around you, get upset over the slightest of things, we've got a few ideas how you can diffuse the tension and respond in healthier ways. 1. Identify the source. One of the crucial elements in developing a plan to tackle impatience and intolerance is to identify just what gets you in that state. Ask yourself: - Why does it make you impatient or why are you intolerant in such an instance? - Is there a better way to respond than with impatience or intolerance? - How could the outcome be more positive if you avoid the source? 2. Be conscious of your responses and reactions. This is perhaps one of the most important steps to correcting how you deal with issues that cause you to lose patience. The more often you stop and acknowledge your flare up, the sooner you’ll be able to grab hold of it before things get out of hand. 3. Breathe deep. Count to ten. As silly and simple as it sounds, it actually does work. Taking pause gives you the opportunity to rethink your response. When you give yourself time to a chance to “cool down” before responding, there’s a higher chance it will result in a more favorable outcome for you and the other party involved. 4. Acknowledge the impact on you. Consider how your actions and reactions are affecting you. Impatience and intolerance often lead to issues with health, such as high blood pressure. Being conscious of what your reactions are doing to your body will help you fight the urge to respond reflexively and often, negatively. 5. Recognize the impact on others. Impatience and intolerance can lead you to make degrading, humiliating statements that could severely traumatize others. Often times, we wish we could take back some things we have said in anger without thinking about it. Then the other person responds with similar vitriol and there begins a fresh vicious cycle. - Spend some time thinking about the possible effects your actions have on others. - Ask those around you how they feel when you display impatience and intolerance. With practice, all of us can grow to be people who are, as PM Lee says, more “caring, generous, [and] decent.” Success Resources: http://www.srpl.net/
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