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Victims of bullying share many common character traits, including: • quietness, timidity, and sensitivity • less inclination toward assertiveness or self-defense • lack of social support, due to having few friends • physical weakness or poor confidence in physical ability • youngest, smallest, or newest of a group • low self esteem • high insecurity • proneness to anxiety and/or depression • proneness to physical complaints • social awkwardness • tendency to yield to demands, or at least convey discomfort and distress There are two types of bully victims: Passive victims are frequently lonely and find it challenging to assert themselves within a group. These types of victims tend to react by crying or withdrawing once they've been targeted. They often prefer adult company, and can actually realize greater social success in adulthood, although there is a tendency to carry low self-esteem and a greater risk of depression into those older years. Proactive victims tend to react to bullies by unsuccessfully employing aggression and fierce tempers. These victims tend to be hyperactive, clumsy, and immature - and thus annoying or irritating to peers in general social scenarios. They often provoke incidents as a result of their own actions that have brought unnecessary negative attention to themselves. Because these victims are frequently instigating confrontations, it is easy to mistake them for bullies themselves. On occasion, victims that fit this profile do attempt to bully peers that they find to be in any way weaker than them. Consequences of bullying for victims: Victims of bullying often develop academic problems, psychological difficulties, low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, feelings of isolation, insecurity, and/or other long term effects. Often the impacts of bullying remain with victims well into their adulthood. Consequences of bullying for bullies: Bullies don't always come out ahead, despite the flash of power they may feel in the midst of their cruel actions. More often than not, bullies' social status declines with their behavior, which tends to only exacerbate their attention-seeking misbehavior in response. Ultimately, their own isolation stifles social development just as much for them as for their victims, and face greater difficulty cultivating positive relationships in adulthood. Tips for bully victims: The bully's goal and primary motivation is to get a "satisfying" reaction from his victim. In this case, "satisfying" would fall along the lines of fear, tears, hissy fits, pleading, or submission. If the bully gets no such reaction from one victim, he has no choice but move on and try eliciting it from another. Refraining from showing emotion or giving in to a bully is the chief method of getting him to back off. If attempts to ignore a bully are ineffective, victims should say "no" to whatever is being demanded of them, and stand up for themselves. The bottom line here is for victims to stand their ground. Again, a target who never gives in is no fun at all for the bully, and he'll have no choice but move on.
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